Recently, I have been lost.
I have been clinging to my faith and trying to find my sanity. I have been burnt out and weary. Judge if you like, but for every one person looking down on this feeling, there are three to five thinking, “me too,” or, “I’ve been there.”
Today, I am convinced my husband doesn’t love me; I am considerably overweight; and I just might be the worst parent ever. Oh, not to mention I am hideously ugly.
Deep down, I am a little crazy…. or maybe I should say still a little crazy. It is hard to say what level of crazy I am, but I know it is less crazy than I used to be. I was so good at hiding the crazy for so long I actually had myself convinced the crazy wasn’t there…. until it was […]
Every day is a battle. Every day I fight to keep the mess inside and be better. Every day I fight the lies of who I feel myself to be with a grasping at who I am made to be.
With age comes wisdom, and I am learning to let some things go (apparently, being cool is one of them). I am learning not to strain so hard to see everything down the road.
I am more than an addiction. I am loved, and I am wonderful….even if I never change. This is one of the great truths of life: we are made for more, but we are enough right now.
I think there is a little bit of crazy in us all. We just need to find the thing that brings us back to center. Some people knit, drink coffee, sing, dance, bike, walk, or bake. I run to my center.