Eye of the Beholder
For the past ten years, my bratty thyroid has controlled my life, my sleep, and my waist line. If you’ve ever struggled with a hormone imbalance, you know exactly what I’m talking about.
I feel as though I’ve been playing an unfair game of tug-of-war with my weight regardless of how healthy I eat or how much I exercise.
Today, I’m through with allowing my thyroid to order me around, but I’m also through with expecting my body to be perfect.
Aside from starting thyroid medication to help my body function properly, I need to remember to allow what God says about me sink into my head and surround my wounded heart-all the way down into the depths of my soul.
13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. 14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. ~Psalm 139:13-14
It’s not easy, let me tell you.
Just the other day, I was tagged in a series of church photos on social media. My church family, Redemption Church Charlottesville (RCC) in Charlottesville, Virginia, was celebrating its launch, so every single person had their phone out, taking videos and pictures.
As I hit “hide from timeline” over and over, I realized I was allowing perfectionism to steal my joy.
Then, as if God wanted to remind me, I read this today:
31 … “Love your neighbor as yourself…” ~Jesus (Mark 12:31)
How am I supposed to love my neighbor or those I’m serving in ministry with if I can’t even love myself?
I was so proud of RCC and how hard everyone had worked to get to launch day. Why was I allowing perfectionism to take away a moment that cannot be relived?
I can’t get that moment back. I can make a choice that, from this day forward, I will see myself as fearfully, beautifully, and wonderfully made. Valued. Loved.
The bottom line is, whether I’m a size 4 or 14, my body will never be perfect. I need to not just be okay with my body but to joyfully thrive and be in love with who I am by reminding myself of who is in love with me.
If beauty is in the eye of the beholder, I better make sure that beholder is Jesus.
Not my warped and unforgiving notions of what is acceptable.
Not the world and its unattainable, counterfeit version of beauty.
About Shelly McGraw
Shelly has a heart for discipleship and spiritual growth, writing weekly devotions for the purpose of equipping the Body of Christ to better serve and follow Jesus. Her encouraging yet thought-provoking devotions are a mix of testimonies, struggles, joys, praises, and everyday life that are overflowing with grace and wisdom.
She has been involved in ministry for over 15 years, serving mostly in worship, youth, and missions. She currently serves in worship at Redemption Church Charlottesville (RCC) in Charlottesville, Virginia. Shelly and her husband, Jason, have three beautiful daughters that they homeschool.
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