Failure has been a great enemy of mine for some time. I have spent years chasing high levels of success and running from the sense of failure nipping at my heels. A glance at my resume would demonstrate that I have worked diligently at overcoming this enemy. Most people view me as a very confident…. possibly cocky…. individual. However, I feel like a failure on a regular basis.
I’ve been trying to shift my perspective, but I still face failure when I look in the mirror and don’t see perfection (physically/emotionally/spiritually). It has been a process, but I am trying to learn to give myself and others some grace.
In an effort to leave myself room to fail, I have decided to come up with a how to for failure (so I can do it successfully).
HOW TO FAIL SUCCESSFULLY:
1. Fail to allow criticism from those without a stake in the game to have an effect on you.
This one is so hard for me. I allow the criticisms of those who don’t really know a complete picture (or have any experience in the area they are willing to criticize) to get to me. I fluctuate between feeling hurt and feeling defensive. For what? If I could learn to fail to care about their thoughts, it would benefit me greatly.
Why let the opinions of those who are not a part of progress weigh you down?
2. Fail to win the argument.
Sometimes, an argument isn’t really about the actions or words that are being debated. Sometimes an argument is about the feelings behind the words and actions. I am trying to learn to hear the feelings.
When someone’s feelings have really been hurt, the argument does not have a winner. I am trying to quit defending the actions and acknowledge the feelings.
3. Fail to focus on every flaw.
Evaluation is a healthy and excellent tool. However, it is important to remember that part of evaluation is to look at what is right as well as what is wrong. Apply this to yourself and others.
Comment below with other steps to fail successfully so we can all fail together.